Your Uncensored Asian Male Dating Guide: The Guide That Racists Hope You Never Read

The following guest post is by Yun Xu of

You are here for the same reason I'm here. We have seen deeply disturbing behavior in our fellow sisters, brothers, and over-privileged racists. As much as I value discussion , I see no actionable advice being offered. So, I wrote a guide and I hope that my fellow Asians benefit from this.

Some of us feel this problem is insurmountable and I don't blame you. It's soul crushing to hear an Asian girl hate on good Asian men and run into the arms of a "me love you long time" racist. However, I want you to consider a different point of view.

Accelerated evolution

This is trial by fire. It's a test of our resolve to grow and fight. There is no "love conquers all" bullshit. Your enemies weaponize the media to spread lies about you, but these lies have only worked because too many of us have failed to improve and more importantly, fight back.

I hate the cost that this war has inflicted upon us, but it has certainly given us the motivation to look within ourselves and evolve, hasn't it? Use this challenge to grow as men and arm our descendants with self respect and the weapons to win against racism.

A woman is only obligated to do one thing: go with the best men available. If we're losing to racist white social outcasts, then what does that say about us? We need to man up. Yes, many Asian women are brainwashed but we bear a great deal of responsibility for matching up to their negative stereotypes.

Racism NEVER goes away on its own. The oppressed have always had to fight. Even after decades of bloody struggle, Blacks still get screwed by the injustice system.

Respect is taken through force. There is no mercy for the weak.

Here are the biggest problems for Asian men:

If I had a use a single word to describe our biggest problem its spinelessness.

- Too many Asian men look and behave stereotypically. There are too many of you who refuse to grow and fight back. Instead you sit back and watch white guys take your women while also spreading small Asian dick lies. These same racist scum are celebrated as saviors of Asian women from our "evil" patriarchal societies.

Case in point: Miss Saigon, is a racist play that paints American soldiers as heroes who give the poor helpless Vietnamese woman a better life and her "evil" Vietnamese boyfriend dies.

Reality: America invaded a country, poisoned its people with Agent Orange, torched its fertile land so no food could be grown, destroyed the economy, raped defenseless women and children (see the Mai Lai massacre among other atrocities), were given orders by their military GENERALS to kill everyone, decorated these rapists with medals instead of punishing them, and now they write a play to make them look these war criminals look like heroes.

Where is the expected outrage? Instead, many Asian females go to see this play. They're paying to be brainwashed with lies. It's like Jews paying to watch a musical featuring Hitler barbequing Jews while doing jazz hands.

Submissive culture
- Our culture encourages passiveness, conformity, deference to authority, and risk aversion. Parts of our own culture are the ultimate cock blockers. It has turned us into a legion of push overs.

Instead of having our respect reciprocated, they see it as an excuse to abuse our women and slander the men.

Asian traitors - Amy Tan and her kind who publish lies to demonize Asian men and worship white males, Asian actors who play demeaning roles (see Miss Saigon - 25 years of self hating racists betraying us), Asian women who are so brainwashed as to slander her own brothers and sleep with the enemy (literally, america invaded/raped Korea, Vietnam, Philippines, Japan, etc) and Asians who automatically respect whites without any critical thought. Many 3rd world nations are suffering precisely because of white imperialism, and yet they show respect to white people. That's truly insane.

Too traditional - A common complaint among women dating Asian men is that their families meddle too much in their lives. You date with marriage in mind. That's a noble outlook, yet you're rewarded with hate from females for it. Just date. It doesn't even matter if they're Asian. It doesn't even matter if you see marriage on the horizon. Being so serious so early pushes many westernized women away.

Destroyed confidence from media attacks - You have zero confidence, so you don't even approach because YOU assume no one would want you. When a girl shows you interest, YOU dismiss it because YOU assume she can't possibly like an Asian male. Some of you guys are even surprised that an Asian girl would like an Asian guy. That's absolutely sickening.

Poor social skills - This is related to the point above. Here's one example that shows this:

After the Wesley Yang article came out, one of the first women who called our ABCs of Attraction offices when they read the story was a Japanese mother. She had married her college sweetheart, the veritable big man on campus, and who was Caucasian. She had 3 sons, two of them who looked white and had no confidence and social issues. They were following their father’s footsteps.

"But her third and youngest son of 14 looked the most Asian and was the shyest, least confident and least outgoing of her sons. She had tried to send him to various summer camps and sign him up for sports and other things when she called me up. But he continued to play video games, play Pokemon, and generally not associate with other people beyond the internet"

Our Evolution

Where you are and where you wish to be are actually quite close. You don't see it that way, because of all the brainwashing you've been subjected to.

I can't remember the exact parable so I'll have to approximate this.

Some hopping insect was trapped inside a jar with a lid over it. For days, it would try to hop out only to smash its head onto the lid and fall back down. It eventually stopped trying. That much is obvious. However, when the lid was finally removed, it didn't try to hop out. It was mentally defeated.

This is regarded as the ultimate victory by Sun Tzu: when your opponent has been mentally broken to not even fight. It's quite sad that WE are mentally broken by their racism. I want you wake up. They do not deserve to win.

Look at yourselves. You are generally educated, loyal, successful, have family values, intelligent, and responsible.

The real question is, why wouldn't women be drawn to you?

That's what I see when I see single Asian men who are so close, and all they're missing is a little guidance to grow that spine that has been stolen from them by their Confucian upbringing and western brainwashing, racist media brainwashing, and sickening treason from Asian females.

I cover all aspects of reprogramming our minds with healthy Asian male mindsets and strong Asian frames of mind, how to fight racism, and more. However, I want to leave you with a taste of the actionable and practical free advice that I offer in-depth at my site.

Here's How We Get the Girl:

1. NEVER match bad stereotypes in any way.  This is super important. I cannot emphasize this point enough. Whatever stereotype they want to box you into, you avoid it like the plague (and it is a plague). They portray you wearing glasses, then get contacts. They show you being scrawny, then get fit (don't worry, skinny guys can get bigger with the right regimen). They show you with poor conversation skills, then learn to converse better. They show you as a push over, then confront racists and cowards and approach women.

2. Confront racism.  Call out their racist behavior. If they call you a chink, make them feel like an idiot by asking them loudly in public why would they call you a chink. Ask them, why are you being a racist? They're stuck in an awkward position now, they have to explain why they're trash. Don't do this in places filled with other racists. You need to pick your battles.

3. Get fit.  There is no escaping this reality. We have to get fit. Why would a girl choose a scrawny guy when she can get a fit one? Lift big, eat big, sleep big. That's the key to getting bigger. I give you all the details on my site including how much protein and carbs you actually need (this site has even better advice!)

4. Disobey your parents.  I don't mean to randomly do so, but there are parts of our traditional culture that need to die. It's okay to care for your parents, but don't let them run your life or drive your partner insane. Don't become a doctor or lawyer just because you parents want you to. Most of those career-types aren't even happy with their lives and you won't even have time to enjoy your life. That's not even factoring in the exceptionally high risk that you won't make it into law or medical school or that your education will cost you an arm and a leg and cripple you with debt before your life even begins, or that your career options are extremely limited in scope, or that your practice could fail to launch, or that you will face an old boys' club that excludes Asians, or that you could get annihilated by a frivolous lawsuit. It's your life so live it the way you want (just make sure you can make a living).

5. Get conversation skills.  I wrote a 7 page section on this that covers everything you'll ever need. Just briefly here:

● It's not what you say, it's how you say it. The tonality of your voice, your pacing, your comfort with pauses, your body language, etc all convey your confidence to her. 80-90% of communication is non-verbal.

● Emphasize the emotions. Talk about her feelings about things and your feelings about things. Avoid talking about only facts. The connections are made when we understand each other's feelings/emotions. Use phrases like "I was excited," "curious," "mesmerized," etc.

● Make statements and less questions. Don't ask where are you from? STATE, "You seem like a New York girl" and she can agree or correct you, but either way it shows that you can make observations about her and that can lead into some interesting conversations. Don't ask what do you do for a living? STATE "I bet you work in a creative field." She'll ask why, and you may remark on her choice of clothing, the way she does her hair, etc.

● Explore topics deeply. Don't become the interrogator who asks a million questions. Explore a topic by noticing the words/themes in her responses. Let's imagine she says, "I go to school for graphic design" now you know she's creative, she's a student, she might work part time.  Does she live on campus? She probably has some favorite artists.  She probably gravitates towards certain art styles. That's just half the equation. You can also talk about your student experience, which artists you admire and why. You see how vast a conversation is if you just explore?

The beauty of such observations is that you can easily flow into another topic when one topic gets stale. You can talk about when she realized her creative talent and that can lead into discussions about childhood. This is how some people can keep conversations going on forever effortlessly.

● Connect with them by relating to their experience and adding your own perspectives.

6. Approach girls.  The one most common complaints from all women about Asian men is that Asian men don't approach them. They get approached by everyone else EXCEPT Asian men. I realize media has annihilated your confidence but you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. This also reflects poorly on all Asian men as a whole, because we appear to match those stereotypes of being meek and unconfident.

Finally, rejection is normal, and EVERYONE goes through it. Understand that and EXPECT it. The greatest sales people in the world know they will have a certain number of rejections before they make a sale. That's the beauty of experience. It gives you perspective so when one approach doesn't work out, you're just a step closer to the right girl. Don't let rejection hurt you. They're not rejecting you as a human being. They don't even know you. You are just not their type.

7. Escalate.  This is surprisingly easy and CRITICAL to meeting women. You must escalate the approach into a sexual nature once comfort has been established, or you'll fall into the dreaded friend-zone.

If you can make guy friends, you can probably get a girl. You simply need a little guidance. I can't go into all the details here, but I wrote out the step by step dating guide for Asian men.  It's full of specific actionable advice (no nebulous "Just be yourself and be confident" bullshit). It's 100% free, and it teaches you everything that you need to know to become the man that women want and the man that racists fear and respect.

Rise up my brothers!

Yun Xu of was sick of watching generations of Asian men getting shafted and wrote a 100% free guide to cure this epidemic. Please understand that I do not give advice to turn you into a creepy pick up artist who lies to or abuses women. My advice will help you become a great man that woman want - not a bag of lame party tricks and childish lines.
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