Alpha Asian

So last Christmas night marked the two year anniversary of my decision to get into pharmacy. My girlfriend at the time and I decided to go on a three day trip to San Francisco. We had a blast window shopping, going out to random restaurants and just enjoying each other's company. It was our last night there and we were having some of that "after-pillow fight conversation." She teases me and says "Honey, I want....two boys and two girls." And I was like "No." And she was like "Okay.. three kids." And I'm like...."No." And with a sigh, she breathes "Two." And then I sigh, cave in and go "Okay fine .... two kids." Without missing a beat, she throws up in my face and I'm like "Babe... too soon!" The next morning, I rush to the nearest pharmacy to buy some Plan B. (They don't call it "the morning after pill" for nothing.) Luckily for me, it was just the stomach flu. It was prett...

To mojorider : You know..being with her was one hell of an experience for me. I had already learned the value of the dollar from my job, but I guess my time with her taught me that it was good to have a steady income as well as having enough reserve. Also it's really weird knowing that (in maybe 10 years) I want to get married...but that doesn't really bother me too much. It's nice having goals, right? As for goals right now, I just really want to finish school and get my job as soon as I can. Of course, once I enter grad school I'm not going to have any time whatsoever to do anything besides study so before I get in I want to work on becoming a "better" person. Most of the pharmacists I work with have already settled down and have kids and they're always telling me how they wished they could have done more when I was my age. Interests: I grew up as a " tiger " kid in a competitive Asian parental environment. I took seven years of art and ten y...

I've been reading a lot of books lately, and I just finished David Mura's Where the Body Meets Memory: An Odyssey of Race, Sexuality and Identity . It's about the author David Mura and his sexual escapades throughout the years. He and his wife had an open relationship for several years, and he writes about his sexual addiction and how his early experiences and issues with race and identity contributed to his addiction to white women. As I was reading his book,  I thought to myself: 1) How the hell did he get his wife to tolerate his bullshit and all his extramarital affairs? 2) Boy is she one patient and forgiving woman to allow him to publish his sexcapades and expose their marital problems. The first half of the book is a bit tedious. He goes over the experiences of his grandparents and parents before, during and after internment. But even though the first half of the book was boring, it showed how historical trauma of a group can leave its impact on a individ...

Thanks to Big WoWo for this one. Check out this candid discussion on love and relationships: Here are some notable quotes from the discussion: At 2:15 Nancy Lee (the girl on the left) says, "About relationships: I don’t have a preference really, but for some reason Asian men don’t really approach me." I'm looking at her going, "REALLY?! You've got to be shitting me?!" But then again, I have heard this complaint from many different Asian women: that Asian men don't approach them. Some of these Asian women then think they're not good enough or don't measure up in some way. At 3:19 Danny Cho says this about making relationships work: "It’s not a chemistry thing for me, it’s a compromise thing. It’s a whether or not I believe in this relationship enough that I’m going to make my sacrifices and be selfless to this person." I think this is very true, and most couples fail to take this into account. The chemistry of a relati...

So I was watching Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle the other night. There's an elevator scene where Harold has approach anxiety . Harold can't think of a thing to say to this beautiful Latina girl in the elevator. In fact he doesn't say anything at all. Many people, regardless of race, will have approach anxiety when they are put on the spot. Women have a hard time empathizing with this, because socially they're not required to make the initial contact. Sure they send the signals, but sending a flirtatious body language cue is much easier than approaching an attractive stranger and gaining their interest. I know 2 guys with 2 very different approaches to women. I've written about guy #1 before . We'll call him Mr. Bohemian, since he lives that type of lifestyle. He is the most unassuming man you will meet, but he is a friendly and passionate person. He likes what he likes and he doesn't care what people think about what he likes. One thing that he ...

You know you're getting older when there's a movie called Hot Tub Time Machine . I've always been a fan of the time travel genre , but when you cross the genre with VH1's I Love the 80's , that's an irresistible combination for me. I can't travel through time and be my own mentor , but I do feel an obligation to give younger men a heads up on life to come. A lot of Asian American sites catering to men talk about improving the AA male image and picking up women. But as a female co-blogger once wrote , there isn't enough talk about how to maintain a good relationship: "What I come across most frequently is advice on how to pick up women or other dating tips. Guys will ask each other if they 'scored' but rarely will guys have an in-depth discussion about their long-term relationship. Men (and women) become far less interested in making a relationship good once it goes into the long-term maintenance phase. But why? How do you get better a...

Oh of course a woman would suggest this... I can see all the men out there rolling their eyes as they read the title of this entry and decide to skip over it. Well, I heard an interesting statistic this morning that said 4 out of 9 relationships will end by February 2009. Supposedly, this is because people feel empowered by the New Year's resolution tradition and thus everyone begins the year by reassessing their lives. Quite frankly, I don't think there is enough talk about how to maintain a good relationship. What I come across most frequently is advice on how to pick up women or other dating tips. Guys will ask each other if they "scored" but rarely will guys have an in-depth discussion about their long-term relationship. Men (and women) become far less interested in making a relationship good once it goes into the long-term maintenance phase. But why? How do you get better at a relationship without having people (that you don't have to pay) to turn to? Co...